Cathy Baker | Through Every Storm » A blog about Faith, Hope, and Love.

This morning we started our revival services with Jon Randles.  We also have a guest worship leader, Robert Baldwin. The worship service was amazing! There is not much that I love more than singing in a great choir in a great church worshipping a GREAT God!

Just before the sermon, Robert sang what we Baptists like to call the “Special Music”. It was a beautiful arrangement (probably his own) of “It is Well”. It only took the first few bars to take me back to a cemetery in northeast Texas where my precious son is buried. Actually, it took me back to the hospital room a few days before when the doctor walked in the door and said, “So, your baby is dead. What do you want to do now?” In that moment, staring down this insensitive doctor, I had to make my first decision of many that would follow in those next few days. That decision? Am I going to fall apart, or will I allow God’s strength to sustain me?

I would be lying if I said I didn’t shed a million tears or let my heart be filled with anger over the unfairness of this loss, but in that moment, I allowed my faith to come in and do what faith is meant to do – sustain me during the darkest hour of my life.  So first, I breathed a prayer of thanks that my husband wasn’t in the room at that moment because he was in full-on protector mode and that doctor would have likely been unconscious on the floor. Then, I prayed for strength and told him that we should induce immediately and get the process started so we could say goodbye to our son.

As we sat planning our son’s funeral in that hospital room where he had been born just hours before, the question of music came up. What song did we want at the service? I thought of all the normal funeral music – “Amazing Grace”, “The Old Rugged Cross”. None of those seemed to fit.  I thought about it for a while and decided the perfect song was “It Is Well”. It was written by a Horatio Spafford as he sailed over the spot where his four daughters died in a shipwreck. If you’ve never read the story behind the song, read it here and you will understand why it was perfect for my son’s funeral.

I’ve never longed for heaven more than I did during that time. I am so thankful that no matter what storms or trials come our way, when we have Christ in our heart, it is truly well with our souls.

Here are the verses we sang that day:

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, thou hast taught me to say,
It is well, it is well with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed his own blood for my soul.

And, Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

Refrain:
It is well with my soul,
It is well, it is well with my soul.

 “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You believe in God; believe also in me. My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.” ~ John 14:1-3

Last night I was struggling with some things that are going on at home that have huge implications for my family, especially my little girl. I have really tried to keep a level head to help keep her anxiety at bay, but I really needed some time and space to process all that’s going on. So last night I left the kids home with my mom while I went to church, and afterward I just spent some time alone praying over everything. At least I was trying to pray over everything. It is one of those situations where I honestly don’t know how to pray.

Since we have absolutely the most amazing pastoral staff at our church, I sent a text message to our Worship Pastor and asked him to pray with and for us about it all. He stopped and prayed immediately and then responded to tell me he was praying God’s peace to cover the situation and be everyone’s compass. He said, “God is way bigger than your fears and stress. Be encouraged!” Besides being completely blessed by the fact that he prayed and responded immediately, God really spoke to me through two words in that reply. “Be Encouraged!”.

Immediately I began thinking of all the scriptures where Jesus says “Take heart” or “Be of good cheer” or “Take courage”. There are a couple of translations that actually say “Be encouraged”. What I heard God saying to me loud and clear is that it is my choice to be encouraged. I can hang on to the worry and fear or I can choose to be encouraged. No one can force me to let go of my worry and anxiety. No one can force me to “be encouraged”. Encouragement and subsequently peace are just like the gift of salvation. God offers it but we have to accept it for ourselves. He doesn’t force it on us.

One scripture I have held onto tightly during my journey as a foster parent is John 16:33. In the NIV it says: “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”